"It's like Hooters, but the girls aren't as pretty..."
What an awesome Zagat review THAT would make! But it wasn't a review, it was a recommendation - I had asked a woman I'd worked with in Bako, one whom I'd become friendly with, where would be a good place to experience a Bako night out.
And she suggested "The Tilted Kilt".
Not at first... originally she's suggested Outback Steakhouse and Applebee's. I'm really beginning to believe the locals never cross the city limits and actually believe all these chain restaurants are Bako originals. But when I pressed her for something a little more authentically Bako, she offered up the Kilt. But not without a warning...
"The big difference is that at Hooters they make the girls wear pantyhose, but not at the Kilt, so you end up seeing all the cellulite. But the food is better!"
Well, with a recommendation like that...
I swear these people are beyond clueless. This particular woman knew I was gay (and had met the boyfriend and me out for drinks) and yet she thought our idea of a night out would involve skanks and wings.
But ya' know...I didn't dismiss it out of hand - you never know, it could be campy good fun, like Jumbo's Clown Room in LA.
So I Googled it.
First of all, it's another frickin' chain! Based in the South - there's a shocker. Bakersfield is it's only California outlet I think, which makes twisted sense and explains why no one has heard of it. It's not so much "kilts" as it it "slutty Catholic schoolgirl".
Britney Spears in tartan with potato skins.
I wanted to bleach my eyes.
I appreciated the suggestion, but ultimately we decided to go another direction.
We did drive-thru at Long John Silver's. The boyfriend got the pirate hat.
