Yesterday was the huge "Bakersfield Business Conference: Triumph of the Will 2010". Judging by the news reports it was a bit of a let down. I think we can all agree it just wasn't patriotic enough.
The entire Wingnut Pantheon helicoptered in to to address the villagers with pitchforks and left just as quickly. No need to mingle with all the salt-of-the-earth riff raff. They stayed just long enough to dish out the red meat and get everyone riled up.
Oops. How did this get in here...
The disappointment stemmed from inflated expectations. Initially everyone assumed the headline event would be an appearance by the "Disasta From Alaska", Sarah Palin. But then it was announced that there would be "surprise special guests" to close out the festivities. All week long the town was abuzz with speculation as to who it would be. My money was on Satan, but the consensus opinion was that it might just be George W. Bush, emerging from his secure and undisclosed location for the first time since the '08 election.
As the Snowbilly-in-Chief finished her remarks, the room was electric with anticipation as to who the surprise guests would be. So you can imagine the collective disappointment when it was announced the closing guests were a trio of "heroes", including Captain "Sully" Sullenberger. No offense to the men, but after all the build up it was a bit of a letdown for people who had paid up to $500 to attend the days events.
Not only that, but the food sucked.
"For $500 I expected more" said one of the participants.
"I've had better at Hodel's..."
