My first thought was "Good for him!". Actually, that's a lie - my first thought was... "are you fucking insane?!?!... In this town?!?!" This is oil country - Black Gold, Texas Tea. Everyone in this town is connected in one way, shape or form to the oil industry. Half the cars here sport "Drill Here, Drill Now. Pay Less" bumper stickers. I kid you not. And they show their hometown pride by driving the biggest, baddest, gas-guzzliest vehicles on the face of the planet. Preferably a Ford. American Made. USA! USA! USA! I've never even seen a Hybrid car in this city, let alone an alternative fuel vehicle. Every time he drives down the street, it's a slap in the face, a poke in the eye. What kind of sick death wish did this guy have?
And then I thought.... "but he recycles..."
I'm beginning to believe recycling is this backwards city's version of the old gay hankie code- just substitute blue bin for red/black/green/etc. hanky...
"Hi there.... I couldn't help but notice your BIG BLUE BIN..... wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say no more..."
So I may have a new gay neighbor! Suddenly my mind danced with hopeful images of us all having Cosmos in the dinky backyard, mocking the yokels. But alas...
I walked out this morning to walk the dogs, and there it was - the huge moving truck.
He's leaving.
Maybe he just couldn't take the pressure. Maybe death threats. An electric car-driving recycler... perhaps it was just a bridge too far for this burg. But he cracked, he bailed. And he wasn't gay - when I saw the Early American/wagon wheel furniture coming out of the house, that particular fantasy vanished in a heartbeat. Such a waste.
But whatever - he's gone. Drove off a bit ago into the sunset. Silently.
And I'm bummed, not only because of the loss of my imaginary new not-gay friend, but also the loss of some convenient cover - you have to believe that a petroleum denier/fossil fuel heretic rates lower than the gays, so I thought he would take all the incoming anti-socialist fire. But like the French, he's retreated. And we're left here all alone.
With our Big Blue Bin.
